39 Pre Marital Counseling Questions to Ask Your Partner

If romantic feelings were the key to keeping marriages together, the divorce rate would likely be well below 50 percent. But feelings alone won’t sustain a couple through all of the challenges that life throws at them. Nationally known financial counselor Dave Ramsey always says that four of the key areas which couples must address as part of their pre marital counseling questions are: children, money, in laws and religion.

Money problems are the number one cause of divorce in America, and by discussing how you’ll earn, spend, save and give, you’ll develop an open line of communication that will serve you well for your whole marriage. Knowing where each other stand religiously is important so you can see whether or not you share the same core values. It’s important that couples agree on these in order to keep their marriage healthy and build a strong foundation for their family.

Here’s a list of pre marital counseling questions that you can discuss with your partner:

Christian Pre Marriage Counseling Questions

Financial Issues

  • Do you have any debt? How much?
  • Will you combine finances?
  • How are you saving for retirement?
  • What are your plans for retirement?
  • What non-retirement investments do you have?
  • Do you have a will?
  • Do you have a budget?
  • Do you have life insurance?
  • Do you want to buy a home? When? Where?

Relationship Issues

  • How will you settle a misunderstanding?
  • How do you usually express your feelings?
  • Which areas do you foresee the most conflict in your relationship?
  • What habits do you dislike about your partner?
  • How will you share in the housework?
  • Do you want children? When? How many?
  • Will one parent stay home to raise the kids?
  • What’s your parenting philosophy?
  • What type of education do you want for the kids?
  • What are your future life and career goals?
  • Have you had sex before?
  • What is your love language?
  • What are your expectations for spending your free time?
  • How do you feel about nights out with friends?

Faith Issues

  • Where does your relationship with Christ fit in your life?
  • Are you committed to this relationship for the rest of your earthly life?
  • How will you help your partner grow spiritually?
  • Will you share your faith with your children?
  • Do you attend the same church?

Family Issues

  • What was your childhood like? How will you raise your children in comparison?
  • How do you get along with your parents and siblings now?
  • What did you learn about relationships and marriage from your parents?
  • What do you dislike about your family? Your partners?
  • How often will we visit family?

By taking the time to ask each other Christian pre marriage counseling questions, you can dig much deeper into each others thoughts and positions on various issues. For some, this may be a real wake-up call, and lead to calling off the engagement. Whether you are engaged, or thinking about becoming engaged, these questions will help you and your partner see deeper into each other. Knowledge is power, and by knowing where you agree and disagree, you can work together to create a plan for handling the pre marital counseling questions on which you disagree.

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